| Amanda 的个人资料Time of Your Life照片日志列表 |  工具  帮助 |
|
Time of Your Life"It's something unpredictable but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life..." 10月2日 music and my life...vol. ?Tracy Bonham - whether you fall
Whether it's the sunshine whether it's the rain
Doesn't make a difference 'til you complain Whether it's the water coming in from the roof Does it piss you off that you're not water proof? Whether you fall means nothing at all It's whether you get up it's whether you get up And you hate the silence as it fills up the room And there's not much to say to your blushing groom Maybe all eyes are on you as you finish the race And the world sees you struggling for last place Whether you fall means nothing at all It's whether you get up whether you get up where to start. i just only heard this song for the first time a couple weeks ago and i thought, "yeah it sounds nice" but then i sat and listened one afternoon and i cried. as i often do. because it really doesnt make a difference until i complain, i'm sitting here living and i'm not attached to myself. i'm watching from accross the street as i stumble and i'm laughing at myself atthe way i dont pay attention. i'm laughing at the way its all too close and all too real. i am pissed off that i'm not waterproof. or just proof...flame proof, pain proof, tear proof. i want to cry less and laugh more. i want to feel everything again so i can appreciate feeling nothing. i love silence because i am so used to living in my own head. i want to hate the silence as it fills up the room. i want to not talk and i want to wish for more and strive to acheive something. i want my life back, i want to be the me i was before. there's not much to say to my blushing groom. i want to protect him, i want to wrap him up in me and keep him safe. i want no one else to be as near to him as i am. i want him to need me less. i want him to need me always. i am falling, i will fall. i will get up. its whether i get up. i will get up. i have to get up. i will get up.
6月26日 I'm Back!well well well...it's been a looong ass time since i have blogged here. I moved over to myspace.com and abandoned this place because i felt that one was more fun simply because i could personalize it more. but anyway here i am , 39 days away from my wedding...working as a shooter girl in a local strip club and as stressed out as ever. lol. some things have happened in my life since january. i got a new job, my dad got a new house and some horses and i now have a god daughter. my grandma passed away in may and i will soon write a blog about that. but for now i havent much else to say but i'm going to add some pics and update lists and such. enjoy!
Amanda 12月12日 Neat1. Choose your favourite band/artist that nobody else has chosen yet: Nirvana Answer ONLY using titles of their songs... 3. Are you male or female: About a girl 6. How do you feel about yourself: Opinion 9. Describe where you want to be: Heart Shaped Box. 10. Describe how you live: Come as you are 11. Describe how you love: Drain You 12. What would you ask for if you had just one wish: Breed. 14. Now say goodbye: MIlk It 12月6日 Gorillaz...DARE"You've got to press it on you,
You just think it
That's what you do, baby Hold it down, DARE Jump with them all and move it Jump back and forth it feels like you were there yourself Work it out Never did no harm Never did no harm It's DARE" I like this song. a lot. it's called Dare by Gorillaz. and it's very fun to jump around and dance to. thank you have a nice day...
Amanda 12月2日 Dash...This morning i woke up to find my youngest cat, Dash, dead by the front door. Unfortunately, there's no real way of finding out what happened because animals arent as important as humans and vets just give you a list of general things that may have happened ie - stroke, heart attack, disease, urine/bladder problem. Needless to say its been a pretty horrible morning. i know to some people it probably seems crazy to even be upset over a dead cat but my cats are like my babies and while i know there was nothing i could have done i cant help but feel slightly guilty, like maybe i should have payed closer attention. i'll miss him coming to the door to greet me when i come in from work, cuddling with me on the couch when i watch tv and always sleeping between damien and i late at night...
miss you
love you
Amanda
11月15日 I HATE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATIONYou know whats really annoying? when i get ready to take the early bus to work because i have 3284 quintillion things to do today and the GOD DAMNED bus goes by 5 minutes early. i know most of you are thinking...5 minutes big deal, you probably should have been out there already anyway. BUT 5 minutes is a BIG deal when it comes to public transportation. the bus stop is right across the street from my house and when its freezing and we're in the middel of what looks like a torrential down pour i wait a couple minutes longer to leave for the bus stop. i usually leave at quarter to the hour and stand there in the cold for 10 to 15 minutes waiting for the bus so today i decide i will leave at ten to the hour to save myself from freezing and SURPRISE! as i'm locking my front door the bus drives by. WHY CANT THESE PEOPLE BE ON TIME???? if he went by my stop 5 minutes early that means he is going by every stop five minutes early. YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE GOING TO MISS THE BUS BECAUSE OF THIS??? I HATE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! like i am seriously starting to wonder if the people have any sort of training at all. most of the time it seems to be they just show up at the bus terminal and say "hi, i would like to drive a bus" then they are given a map and the keys to a GRT bus and on the way out the door they are told "just to let you know, there are no rules indicating a need to be nice to the people you drive around." stupid ass losers. i got on a bus last week and listened to the driver tell some kid she didnt have any stops on a street she CLEARLY has 2 stops on. and when i asked her (to make sure the route hadnt changed and i was on the right bus) she said "oh, i dunno maybe i do go down parkside dr. where is that again? i'm from out of town." WHAT THE HELL!!!! in what way is it okay for her not to know her route just because she is from out of town. you're a bus driver lady...BUY A MAP!!!!. i'm sure most everyone is shaking their head thinking "oh amanda why dont you just get your license" but my point here has nothing to do with me having or not having a license. i pay $55 a month for a ride to and from work everyday and i dont think its to much to ask that the driver be polite, know where they are going and show up on time. stupid shit bullcrap.
Amanda 10月30日 what brings people here ?here are the latest google searches that have brought people to my space...
"Perfect ten Girls"
"How to get Girls to Love you."
"Shawn Desman"
"da play girl site:spaces.msn.com"
"favored sexy pictures"
i love this....its kinda creepy that i can see what people search for. why would i need to know this stuff. either way i love it.
10月25日 Heavier than Heavenso, i just finished reading the book Heavier than Heaven...a biography on Kurt Cobain. WOW! what a great book i dont usually read biographies because they are usually filled with boring detail about people and the people they know or knew and blah blah whatever. This book was not like that, yes there were a lot of people in the book and a lot of detail but it wasnt boring at all...i just wanted to keep reading and reading and reading.
Everytime i listen to Nirvana i think to myself "i should learn to play the guitar so i could learn all these songs" I actually tried this once but realized it not easy to teach yourself how to play an instrument that you cant even tune. so i think maybe i will try to aquire a guitar and get my younger brother to try and teach me the basics. who knows maybe i will be really good at it...anyway it's freezing in my house and my hands are turning to ice from typing, so i'm out for now....byeeeeeeeee
Amanda 10月19日 My Birthdayokay so the day started off awesome, i woke up to find a message from robert saying for my birthday he is gonna pay for my wedding shoes, whatever shoes i want!!! yay!!! and then i spoke with Jay (the ex) and he told me that he is planning to put the song he wrote for me (when we were together), on his album when it comes out...so it was all good, and then 30 minutes after i woke up the day started to suck....lots of crap happening with work they kept calling all freaking day, then there was a conference call in which Mike (DM) gave us all shit for not remembering to call him every night like we're supposed to. then my dad showed up at 6 and the night started to get better again when he told me he was taking me to see BEAUTY AND THE BEAST!!!! there is a new theatre near my house and the first play they put on is a disney play...I LOVED IT !!!!! it was amazing. aaaaaaand last week Cinderella came out on DVD and damien got it for me and i watched it and loved it sooooooo much. a very happy, very disney birthday. and thanks to everyone that wished me a happy birthday online! love you guys
Amanda Shawn Desmanokay,so...some people may not know that i have an obsession with Shawn Desman...it all started in 2002 when i saw him perform for the first time at BMG in Toronto and it has just spiraled out of control since then, i have seen him perform 6 times now and met him (briefly) twice. anyway i am not going to bore you all with ALL of the details from ALL of the times i have stalked the poor man but here is the latest... ps - this is gonna be long...
so, Shawn was in Kitchener performing at an event called "hip-hoptoberfest" along with Moka Only, Maestro and Divine Brown. This event is put on by the local radio station (91.5 the beat) and they said on the radio that the only way to get into the concert was to win tickets. so when i found out Shawn was gonna be there i told EVERYONE i know to try and win me tickets or to let me know if the knew anyone that had tickets they wanted to sell. well come tuesday night(night before the show) no one had any tickets for me and i didnt win any so i was pretty bummed.
so on wednesday (concert day) i went to work in cambridge and proceeded to tell the girl i was working with ALLLLLLLLLLLLL about my Shawn history and how bad i wanted to go to the show and blah blah blah. then i get a call from Brandon (a guy i worked with in Kitchener) saying "i have a friend that has one ticket he wants to sell do you want it?" to which i reply "yes i do!" so i call my fiancee and tell him i only got one ticket and sorry he cant come with me but i am going alone. then i called my dad to tell him the situation and he said "i can buy you tickets" (so the radio station lied) so i told him to buy me a ticket for Damien (fiancee) AND THEN...some guy walks into the store i work in and says "hey i noticed you girls are listening to hip-hop music in here would either of you be interested in going to hip-hoptoberfest?" HOLY HELL HE GAVE US 3 FREE PASSES!!! so i gave 2 of them to Sara the girl i work with and we made plans to go...all in all we ended up with 7 passes and only 5 people went so 2 passes went to the garbage. so anyway...(sorry this is so long)...we were off to the show and we got there at about 8:30 pm because the doors opened at 7 and i had a feeling they would do something stupid like put Shawn on early and i would miss it. but they didnt, i started making my way to the front of the crowd at about 9 ish when moka only was performing. (i'm not gonna comment on the rest of the perfromers because this is already long enough) then Maestro peformed and during that performance the two girls in front of me heard me talking to Sara about Shawn and how perfect he is so they turned around and said "hey honey, you have a camera and you obviously REALLY love shawn desman so you can get in front of us." OMG!!!! I LOVE THOSE GIRLS! so now there was only one more girl in front of me, she kept flashing the performers and just being really dumb and gross so i think to myself "no way she is flashing Shawn while i'm standing behind her! I'll punch her in the tits." then a few minutes later she wanted to fight me because i was pushing her (maybe it was her first concert, i dunno. people push me there is nothing i can do) ANYWAY a few minutes later she heard me mention Shawn and she turns around and says "i'm not here to see Shawn i only want to see maestro so you can have my spot once he's done" by this time i'm SOOOOOOOOO EXCITED. so here i am front and center and i had to stand there for like and hour and a half before Shawn finally came. but when he came OMG!!!!!!!! i think i died. i looked at Sara and said "just so you know you are about to see something like you have never seen before. your life will never be the same again." clearly she thought i was crazy.
so Shawn comes on and its FUCKING WONDERFUL (excuse my swears) he was so beautiful and perfect and i knew he would be pulling someone on stage and i wanted it to be me so bad (it wasnt) but whatever i enjoyed it sooooooo much. there were so many girls there screaming for them but they were all my age (20-25ish) so i knew they were just screaming because he was hot. NO ONE ELSE AROUND ME ACTUALLY KNEW THE WORDS TO THE SONGS!!! jerks. i was so much cooler than all of them. while he was singing insomniac he ripped off his shirt and i swear to you my heart stopped beating. I LOVE SHAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i have started a new folder of pics of shawn and the ones from the concert are there now....so all you people who pretend you dont like him can secretly come here to drool over the pics and no one will ever know... 10月15日 stuffRandom thoughts...
1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. If not for you, someone may not be living.
8. You are special and unique.
9. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you.
10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
12. Always tell people how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know. 10月11日 AHHHH THE DRAMA!!!for anyone who cares...
well today is supposed to be my first day in the Cambridge store but this morning i got a frantic call from Jenna saying "i'm throwing up blood i cant work today" and then...."can you call frank and your store and work something out so you can close my store tonight?" so i had to make all the calls and all the arrangements and as it works out i am not starting in my shiney new store today but instead i am back @ the waterloo hell hole. i wish she would just quit. and give me the store already. grrrrrrrrr 9月27日 trying one more timeokay so it's my day off and it's 2:24 pm. i am going to sit here until i figure out how to add music to my space. wish me luck, i could be here alllllllllllllllll week.
I DID IT!!!!! I ROCK. THANKS TO JAYMI, WES AND OTHER AWESOME GUY WITH AN AWESOME SPACE!!!! its actually 12093793284738 million times better than ithough it would be. because i get to have music videos....VIDEOS!!!!!! music videos are my life and i'm so excited i get to show everyone all the videos i love!!!!!!
yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay 9月25日 September 16th - 25th lolso i finally went to spend a weekend with Christine !! it was sooooooooooooooo soooooooo soooooooooooooooo fun. Friday i got there at around 9pm and we went back to her place to chat about the wedding. i am relieved to say that she will in fact be a part of my wedding. everything is straightened out and i am the happiest person ever for it. so after the wedding chat and the showing of the ring we decided we were gonna go out to a club called Metro. we were really excited because word on the street was that there are a couple different rooms in this place and one of them has platforms with stripper poles. sounds like my kind of place! lol. so we get all dolled up and head out. turns out there are 2 different rooms, one playing urban stuff and the other playing house stuff. and of course the poles are in the room with the house stuff. BOOOOO! so there was no pole dancing involved in my weekend. however there was a clothing show, at which i got a kick ass pair of shoes for $10 and some new black sleeves from a company called 'play dead' very cool stuff. then saturday night we went out to dinner at some steak house and ate steak and veggies and some WICKED awesome chocolate dessert. we also had a couple belini's (these are slushy drinks with mucho alcohol in them) so they were fun fun fun. i must say the laughing never stopped. then we decided to go clubbing again and we headed for c-lounge (where christine used to work) we waited in the "line-up" which was really just a group of people waiting to get in...everyone was just standing in a big group and getting in randomly. it was wierd. then one of the security guards noticed christine standing there, proceded to say hi and gave us vip wristbands and let us in and all the good stuff. it was fun, there were cute boys, pretty girls and much dancing. there were also many not so cute/pretty people for us to laugh at while they got drunk and made fools of themselves. anywhoooo that was that...sunday we went shopping on queen street and in china town on the hunt for bobby socks for me...you know the ones youbuy for little girls with the lace around the ankle...yeah i want some and figured i'd be able to find them in toronto. i was wrong! we checked EVERYWHERE. and then i came home to my hunny and went to work on monday, i was told that Mike and the VP were coming on tuesday so damien and i (he came to help out) stayed at the store until 11 pm making sure the store was PERFECT and he didnt show up. then wednesday damien and i had to go to court and the date hearing was remanded due to complications in another trial. so we will be going back again in a couple months. and then...on thursday Mike showed up at 5:30 after jenna left and basically told me the store was ALL wrong, everything is in the wrong place and major changes need to be made. anyway he called on friday and gave her crap for all the things done wrong and she went ahead a quit her job. so she is leaving in two weeks and i have applied for the job as manager and mike says he will come in and talk to me about it so we'll see, really i just hope that we dont get someone mean and crappy in the store because i will have to quit. i hate working for/with mean people. in fact i hate that there is even a such thing as mean people. MEAN PEOPLE ARE SUCK. so anway now i am up early and damien is coming into the store again to help out. sorry about the loooooong blog but this thing needed an update.
peace out
Amanda 9月14日 Dash and the TPmy cat seems to think paper towel and toilet paper are free...and this is becoming, not only annoying, but very expensive. it's a serious problem because we cant lock him out of every room in the house. damnit. spoiled brat cats... |
|
||||||
|
|
